# The invalid of Grape Vine - Link: https://mywalkabout.net/the-invalid-of-grape-vine/ - Published: 2020-10-27T06:17:11-07:00 - Author: My Walkabout **The week after my return** from [Aravaipa](https://mywalkabout.net/aravaipa-farms-orchard-inn/) I was getting progressively worse. The pain increased day after day, making me a bitch to work with as I hobbled, cried and cursed through each work day. I’ve had pulled muscles before, but this felt much, much worse. Perhaps I have Covid? Breathing was extremely labored, sleep became a thing of the past, and my mind went to dark places the worse I got. Cancer? Do I have freaking cancer? Thursday night as I’m leaving the office (crawling to the front door actually) I tell a co-worker that if things don’t improve overnight, I might just have to go to a hospital. ![](https://i0.wp.com/mywalkabout.net/wp-content/uploads/2020/10/98A2675D-2123-496D- 909A-DFA2D201839E.jpg?resize=640%2C640&ssl=1) **Masked up**, I drive the few blocks to our local hospital at some ungodly hour in the morning. After many tests and a shot of morphine to make life slightly bearable, they tell me they can’t find anything wrong. Yet obviously something is wrong. I hate our healthcare system. The doctors think I’ve just seriously bruised my lungs (hematoma) and my back. They can’t prescribe pain medication due to an overabundance of drug seekers. I get told to take plenty of advil and to buy a heating pad. Yes, our healthcare system is broken. I go back to work later that Friday, finish up a few things, then leave for the weekend. If I am dying, I might as well be in Nature. Besides, it’s too late to get my money back on the cabin I have for the weekend. Being an invalid out in the wilderness can only help me. ![](https://i0.wp.com/mywalkabout.net/wp-content/uploads/2020/10/IMG_6714.jpg?resize =640%2C360&ssl=1) **So plans change**, and my invalid self spends time outside Mayer, Arizona, in the grape vine cabin. Solitude and expansive porch views do me well as I try to rest and heal. ![](https://i0.wp.com/mywalkabout.net/wp-content/uploads/2020/10/IMG_4130.jpg?resize =640%2C360&ssl=1) **The surrounding fires** from California and New Mexico lit up the skies like a devil’s eyes. Apocalyptic notions run through my head, as I welcome the end of the world in my current condition. ![](https://i0.wp.com/mywalkabout.net/wp-content/uploads/2020/10/IMG_4076.jpg?resize =640%2C360&ssl=1) **I throw myself a pity party**, and dive right into a pool of depression. 2020 has been a shit show so far though, so perhaps this is just par for the course. I do have big plans in just a couple of weeks, but thinking about having to cancel them bring back the tears. I watch the clouds burst over the grape vine cabin, and just wonder what will happen next….. ### Share this: * [ Email ](https://mywalkabout.net/the-invalid-of-grape-vine/?subject=%5BShared%20Post%5D%20The%20invalid%20of%20Grape%20Vine&body=https%3A%2F%2Fmywalkabout.net%2Fthe-invalid-of-grape-vine%2F&share=email) * [Post](https://x.com/share) * [Share on Tumblr](https://www.tumblr.com/share) * [ WhatsApp ](https://mywalkabout.net/the-invalid-of-grape-vine/?share=jetpack-whatsapp) * [ Nextdoor ](https://mywalkabout.net/the-invalid-of-grape-vine/?share=nextdoor) * [ Threads ](https://mywalkabout.net/the-invalid-of-grape-vine/?share=threads) * [[ * [Tweet](https://twitter.com/share) * [ Reddit ](https://mywalkabout.net/the-invalid-of-grape-vine/?share=reddit) ### Like this: Like Loading…